I’m in the process of changing tribes and I’m watching what happens during the shift. How I feel about letting go of the familiar that no longer works and what I am doing to reach out to embrace the new community. There is a sense of loss and a sense of anticipation.
The old tribe does not work
It took me awhile to figure out I was in the wrong tribe. I didn’t fit in. What’s more, I didn’t WANT to fit in because our ideas and interests are so different. In my old tribe, I could not share my excitement of discovery, the satisfaction of my recent accomplishments or engage in an in-depth conversation. I need all of that in my life. It was a huge relief to acknowledge that I needed a new tribe and let go of the one that no longer worked for me.
How to make your way through the emotional exit
My emotional exit has been gradual. I simply filled up my time doing more work with my new online course communities. Recently two remaining ties to the community were severed and there was some emotion attached to this final letting go of the old tribe. Someone volunteered to take over my position as substitute secretary for the Resident’s Association. That freed me from attending any meetings or events that didn’t interest me. In addition, the editor of the community newsletter where I have been serving as Associate Editor for four years wants to make the newsletter smaller. I realized I’m ready to give that up too. I have many forms of writing projects going to nurture my new tribe. The new tribe is exceedingly receptive to what I share. I know I’m on the right track because the universe offered ways for me to release these two remaining ties. Now I am looking at what I want to do about the physical isolation as I choose not to interact in the community in which I live while also looking forward to the satisfaction and encouragement I am getting online. That’s the betwixt and between – the awkward space in changing tribes.
Are you filing yourself up with what counts?
When you release one thing, you make room for another. As my life fills with writing courses and producing podcasts and having 1:1 conversations with members of the Deeper Song Community I am awesomely happy. I am encouraged, appreciated, and inspired by members of my new tribe. I’m happier than I’ve been a long, long time. All because I’m in the right place for me at this time in my life.
What do you need to release in order to make room for what you want?
You may need to move away from a particular non-supportive friend. You may be dissatisfied with part of your job or maybe the whole job no longer excites and nurtures you. We change. Our interests change. We learn new skills, we develop new passions. That means our choices need to change too.
What, exactly, do you need to change? How will you go about doing that? Are you willing to move through the awkward space that comes when changing tribes?
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