Cara Lumen | Sing a Deeper Song

Sing a Deeper Song

Self Cultivation

How to Invite Serenity into Your Life

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Serenity is hard to capture when you fill your life too full. What do you release? What do you change? How do you go about bringing more moments of serenity into your life?

Slow Dow

You have to say “no” to a few things. You have to cut the clutter that takes up your space and your time. You have to choose your priorities and let the rest fall away. When you know what you want to achieve, choose to do only those things that help make it happen.

Immerse Yourself

The easiest way to feel serenity is to immure yourself in whatever you are doing. You may become completely absorbed in a walk in nature. You may give yourself over to building something or cleaning something or writing something. Do not think about what is next or what still needs to be done. Be present in the moment. When you sink deeply into the experience at hand, you will feel serene.

I was faced with completing a series of steps that I had never done before. It was simply a matter of putting up my first podcast on my site and on iTunes. I had the directions. I simply immersed myself in the step that was before me and when that was complete moved on to the next. It kept me both focused and serene. I wasn’t aware of my steady progress until later when I realized how much I had done and that I had achieved my goal, one focused step at a time.

Move Mindfully

Pay attention to how you feel. Explore the connection between your awareness and what you are doing. As you move deliberately thought the actions you take, become more aware of their beauty and their intricacy. Be mindful of what you say. Listen before you respond. Pause before you take action. Immerse yourself in what you are doing. Cultivate mindfulness as a path to experiencing serenity. Lean to appreciate and savor more moments.

Notice your progress

Stay in the moment, but take time to acknowledge and appreciate your progress. Then return to the task at hand. When you see how immersion and mindfulness move you steadily forward, you will begin to trust the process . Each time you practice giving yourself over to the moment, it will be easier to lose yourself in the work you do.

Be still

Quite your mind. Still your body. Release your awareness. Move into the place of peace that resides in each of us. Practice being still and hear and feel what becomes apparent. .

Be Patient

Life is an unfolding process that moves in cycles that cannot be rushed or altered. Any adjusting that needs to be done is within you. Take action. Don’t take action. Speak. Stay silent. Let the flow of serenity within you guide your steps.

 

To Sing a Deeper Song Consider

The Next “Now.”

The Power of Mindful Listening

The Spaces In Our Lives

Nothing Is Required But the Next Step

Patience and the Unfolding Process

The Cycle of Moving Forward

 

The Set Aside Day

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You know this trick, “I’m going to set aside a day to….” It’s actually a good idea. Here are some things you could accomplish in a set-aside day.

Emphasis Day

The idea for a Set-Aside Day came when I wanted to add two regular actions to my life. I wanted to juice more and I wanted to walk more. I was always coming up with an excuse not to do either. I decided to choose two days a week to emphasize these choices. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I’m going to have a smoothie for breakfast and juice for lunch. On that same Emphasis Day, I’m going to walk, consciously, purposefully, attentively. I can do that.

New Habit Day

I also want to add more stretching for flexibility to my life. I’ve identified several organic times in my day that I could do this but again, I seem to let those opportunities slip by. By declaring one day a week a New Habit Day, I will begin to add another form of exercise to my life.

Improvement Day

It occurred to me that my Qi Gong practice would improve if I would stand longer in each position. I will also go back over the book I learned it from to make certain I am doing the form correctly. I could also go online for videos. What skill, habit or action could you improve on an Improvement Day?

Get it Done Day

There’s a project you’ve been meaning to do forever. Choose a day and do it. I’d be willing to bet that you can get it done in a lot shorter time than you thought you could. Whether it’s simplifying your belongings, organizing your pantry, or giving the dog a bath, taking time to complete long-avoided projects has an amazingly comforting and satisfying affect. What do you finally need to do?

Organize Day

Systems are good. They can save you time and make you more efficient. Just today in my spiritual reading, I can across a quote that would be perfect for my book on unfolding. Fortunately, two days ago I created a document to collect the quotes for several books, including the one on unfolding. A few clicks and I had the quote saved where I wanted it. When you set up systems for capturing ideas or reminders, you can quickly move those ideas to a safe place and get back to work. What would you organize on an Organize Day?

Promises to Keep Day

Was there something you said you would do that you keep putting off? Create a Promises to Keep day and do what you said you would do. It’s important to keep your promised time line, especially when someone else needs your piece of the puzzle before he or she can proceed. What undelivered promises are haunting you?

Learn It Day

Most of the time when we put things off, it’s because we don’t know how to do it. I’m dragging my feet on digital publishing and on making my own book covers. If I set aside a day and focus on understanding the process, I will be well on my way to owning a new skill. Is there something you’ve been putting off that you could easily do if you learned a little more?

Read It Day

I have some esoteric books I have owned for months that I have yet to read. I can’t read the books in one day, but I could certainly get started in a Read It Day. Perhaps even looking through the book and examining the table of contents will deepen my interest and motivate me to get started.  I am currently reading some move-me-forward books about business; however, I would also like to read these spiritually oriented books in addition to the ones I read daily. A Read It Day might help.

Make a Choice Day

Look at a choice as an opportunity to explore an idea and simply pick something and do it. On a Make a Choice Day you could do some research. List the good and the not so good. Visualize where each choice will take you. Write down the constrictions along with the opportunities. Do whatever it takes to chose something and begin to move forward. You can always choose something else if the first choice seems to lead in the wrong direction.

When do I want a Set-Aside Day?

Willingness is important. You won’t do the project if you are not really interested and willing to do it. Having the time to do it is important. You may have to rearrange your calendar and select the best time to set aside. If it’s a new habit that you want to establish, move into it gently. I don’t want to juice every day but I certainly would like to walk every day. Yet I’m beginning with doing both twice a week. I’ll allow the walking to move into other days when it seems right.

Which Set-Aside Day will you choose? Can you put it on your calendar right now?

The Power of Mindful Listening

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The core of a good conversation is mindful listening. When you listen well people feel heard, they feel understood. As a mindful listener, you want to connect with others on even the unspoken levels.

Mindful listening contains an invitation

When you engage in conversation, you seek to know another person better, to learn who they are and what they want. They want the same from you. Conversation is an exchange, not a dialogue. A conversation is a conscious exchange in which you listen to what is said as well as what is unsaid, and thoughtfully responding to it.

Mindful listening moves you both forward

I measure a meaningful conversation by what I learn in the exchange. We find common interests. We share our ideas on the topic. We both articulate our feelings and concerns. We learn from each other. The conversation stays current and relevant. We speak of our expectations, discovery and objectives.

Mindful listening is complete attention

How often do you find yourself busily thinking up how you will respond long before the other person has finished speaking? You aren’t listening you are reacting. Can you stay on topic? Sometimes a phrase in the other person’s conversation triggers a response in me that I have to filter, because it is off topic, it will not move the conversation forward so I refrain from sharing it. Listen attentively and filter what you choose to add to the conversation.

Mindful listening is balanced and respectful

Conversation is not just about you. It is about a flow of exchange that honors the needs of the participants. I was excited about achieving a goal that I shared with a group of friends: “I’ve just gone an entire year without missing a single day of Qi Gong.” A person in the group immediately jumped in with, “My daughter has an exercise room in her basement.” She changed the topic so thoroughly and so rapidly, that no one had a response for me. I would have liked someone to realize that I was happy about my achievement and add a comment that acknowledged my success. I know two people who quickly move a conversation back toward themselves, regardless of the topic. I don’t know whether it is because they identify with a situation being discussed or if they are insecure and need to talk about their own lives to show that they are equal. Changing the topic to talk about you every time can be a real conversation stopper. A story is not an exchange unless it is used as an example of a point. I’m not drawn to reminiscing; I want to know what you are doing now, in this moment, to change your life. Make certain what you add to the conversation is relevant to the flow of conversation, acknowledges the needs of the participants and keeps the topic moving forward

Mindful listening is inquisitive

I love to learn and talking to intelligent, thoughtful, self-aware people is always a meaningful experience. I once found myself sitting next to a doctor engaged in research. Within minutes, we found the common ground of food as the foundation of health. He was doing research on the health benefits of broccoli and I’m a vegan. I was learning a lot. The conversation was not very far along when another person joined us and started talking football to the doctor. That change of topic effectively shut me out of the conversation. When you join a conversation, listen before you leap. Be aware of the existing group dynamics.

Mindful listening leads to thoughtful interaction

It is easy to give advice but the truth is people seldom ask for it. That doesn’t mean you can’t insert some questions designed to help the other person expand their options. “Have you looked into…?” “Does the concept of ___ fit in with your situation?” No one is going to do “it” the way you did or do. Listen for the underlying motivation of a situation and see where that takes the conversation. Sometimes attentive listening is the true gift you have to give.

Mindful listening results in an exchange

If the underlying purpose of a conversation is the exchange of ideas, then there must be interaction. It cannot be one person drawing a line in the sand with their particular viewpoint. A conversation is a thoughtful exploration, an exchange of ideas, observations and beliefs to see what you can learn from each other. Consider each viewpoint. No one is right. No one is wrong. And no one needs to change her mind. You have come together to exchange ideas and learn from each other. Understanding an opposing viewpoint is a healthy way to learn. The best solution is usually a compromise. Look for your common ground.

Mindful listening contains silence

There are moments of silence in a good conversation. It may be a pause to consider what has been said. It may be the moment you take to filter your response to make certain it moves the conversation forward. It’s very exciting to find yourself in a pause where your mind is sorting, filtering and absorbing what was just said. Those moments of contemplation are hugely satisfying.

Mindful listening is perceptive

Use your intuition to tune into what lies beneath a person’s words. Do not jump to conclusions. Deepen the conversation to uncover what beliefs and assumptions lay beneath an observation or a position. Ask questions. Listen carefully. Take time to formulate your response.

A mindful listener monitors her body language

Notice your stance. Is it aggressive? Relaxed? Competitive? Contemplative? I had a woman come up to ask me a question and her body language was so aggressive that it felt threatening. She was learning forward, in my face with her hands on her hips. Her purpose was to ask me a question, to resolve a situation. I was not receptive to the conversation at all. Monitor your body language. Don’t get in their space. Don’t withdraw by leaning back. Don’t cross your arms. Take conscious breaths as you listen and relax you body so you are more receptive to the exchange. 80% of what you understand in a conversation is read through the body not the words.

As a mindful listener simply “be”

You don’t need to come up with wise comments. You don’t need to entertain. Pay attention. Listen. Be fully, totally present in the exchange. Engage the other person in an exchange. Then you will absorb the gift present in every conversation.

Practice Moving Your Gaze

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Change is as simple as moving your gaze. When you look at a situation or a person from a different perspective, you discover new options, new motivations, and unique solutions.

Examine a Small Point of View

I am often prompted to move my gaze by something I read. A phrase, a concept, or a word resonates deeply within me and I stop what I am doing to consider it. What does that mean? How would l apply that in my life? What would I discover if I changed my perspective? I have entire articles and books and poems that have emerged from the impact on my thinking of one small word or phrase. What resonates to you out of the whole? What small concept would you like to incorporate into your life.

Change your viewpoint

I have a rocking chair in my living room. In the normal usage of the room, it faces the center of the room and thus the other chairs. I sit in that chair a lot to read. Recently I turned the chair to face a different direction. It was in the same place, it was simply turned to face another direction so that when I sat in it to read, I could easily glance up and see the birds at my feeders, or the clouds moving across the sky or the birch tree branches moving. Moving the direction that chair faced a mere 45 degrees allowed me to enjoy an entirely different view, one that had been closed off to me when I faced the “expected” direction. A different view can come from moving your gaze only a few degrees. How can you change your viewpoint.

Gain a new perspective

I avoided getting old for a long time. I hung out with younger people. I didn’t even go to the doctor because I wanted to keep holding a positive view of my life. Finally, I had to move to get closer to my children. I went through some physical stuff like knee replacement and cataracts, but then there I was, in a home with a lot of seniors wondering who I was. And I began to joke that my 5-year plan was to simply be here. That viewpoint did not lead me on any adventures. It did not open any doors. And it certainly was not at all satisfying. When a friend asked what I would like to tackle in the next 30 years it opened up such fields of possibility that my entire life changed. I had a purpose. I had interesting things I wanted to explore. I had things I wanted to produce and share. What do I want to achieve in the next 30 years? That’s a long time. How can I make an impact? How can I enrich lives? I have many skills to bring forward. I have lessons I have learned from my past. If I want to make an impact, what group of people do I want to impact and how do I want to do it? What happens if you raise your eyes and look at the next cycle of your life?  How can you impact others? How many lives can you touch? What do you want to tackle in the next 30 years?

Move a few boulders

Move some of the fixed objects in your life, if not in reality, in your imagination. One boulder might be in the form of a physical activity you can no longer do the way you did when you were younger. Choose a smaller boulder to conquer.

Another boulder may be a difficult person in your life. Look for ways to flow around that barrier. Figure out ways to turn away from and go around that person.

Most boulders are placed there by you. They come from your beliefs, your fear, and your interpretation of a circumstance. That makes them extremely easy to move – you simply have to change your own thinking.

I wrote these poems 18 years ago.

On Prospective

I came to a hard place.
It was more than a bump.
It was more than a boulder.
It was like a river—
A wide gulf I could not cross.

Until I made it less significant.
Until I saw it as a creek.
As a trickle.
As a dew drop.

Then I could cross over.

© 1996 Cara Lumen

Along my path

Along my path there are many objects.
There are steep places.
There are low places.
There are boulders and ledges.
There are rockslides and canyons.
Along my path.

Sometimes I struggle on my path.
To get over or around.
To by-pass or leap over.
But always I move on.
Always I move forward.
Along my path.

When I know myself as simple energy
I can be like the fog.
Moving forward.
Filling every crevice.
Expanding into every hole, every space.
When I am energy.

When I know myself as simple energy
There is nothing to climb over
or go around.
There is simple flowing –

Flowing my energy out.
Reaching the boulders and the bumps.
Filling the ditches and the canyons.
When I know myself as energy

When I know myself as simple energy
There is no stopping.
There is only
a soft,
gentle
movement
forward.

© 1996 Cara Lumen

Get off the “safe” path

It is safer to follow the beaten path of your profession, but it certainly can be dull. What if you went exploring? What would you find? There are so many opportunities today to deeply pursue an interest, to find like-minded people and to participate with people all over the world. Look at the detours that show up and take a few of them. Explore your own potential to see what uniqueness you have to offer. Great adventure awaits you off the beaten path.

Let go of perceived limitations

It’s very easy to wallow comfortably in your present circumstances. I am surrounded by people who are simply watching where they take their next step. They never look up, they never look ahead.  I nearly fell into that trap of low expectations for my life. The idea of a 30-year plan has turned me into an aging but rejuvenated energizer bunny. I have let go of all concepts of that limitations that might come with age and continually make plans to move forward as if I had all the time in the world and all the tools and insight and stamina I need to make a difference. What limitations do you perceive for yourself?

Know Yourself

If you don’t know what you want, you’ll never get it. If you don’t know what nourishes you, you’ll never attract more of it. Strengthen your practice of self-cultivation., Create your own spiritual journey.. Learn to interpret and trust your intuition. Notice how others response/react to you. Notice what they seek from you.   How do you want to be in service? How do you want to shape your life in this next cycle?

Uncover your options

The best place from which to choose an option is where you are right at this moment. Explore your emotions. Examine your successes and your failures and absorb their lessons. Look into your heart and see where you want to go next. Then examine the options laid out before you and measure them with the criteria you identified. Examine how you feel right now. What do you want more of in your life? What could you do without? When you practice moving your gaze, you will begin to see all manner of new opportunities. Then you have only to choose.

Raise your expectations

My goals are simple. I want to educate, motivate and inspire people until I’m no longer in physical form. And I would love it if my words kept touching lives after that. My major purpose is to meaningfully affect lives so I’m now giving all my writing away free. I wouldn’t mind knowing of some results, like emails from readers letting me know what changed for them. That would help me better meet their needs. I expect to soar. I expect to discover new concepts, I expect to change, I expect to be a better friend, I expect a deeper spiritual life. What do you expect?

Notice how you feel

The most important part of moving your gaze is to see how you feel about the new position. When you work within your passion, when you have an impact on the people you really want to serve, it is unbelievably rewarding. If what you are doing does not feel richly satisfying, go do something else. Move your gaze. How can you better honor your talent? What new skills do you possess that could take you in a new direction. Who needs what you have to offer?   Create your area of service around your strengths. Spend the majority of your time doing things that make you feel enriched.The freedom to choose and to change belongs to us.  Practice moving your gaze and see where it leads you.

Wander Beyond All Paths

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Years ago, I veered from the norm. I “took the road less traveled” and that has indeed made all the difference. (Robert Frost) I only know vaguely why I did it. I have no idea where the courage came from that empowered me to make the unprecedented change. I only know I made a choice 40 years ago, that both saddened and enriched my life. I would make the same choice again for it led me to unexpected gifts of insight and understanding, the development of my talents, and a soul-satisfying journey that continues to nourish me today. “Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail,” says Emerson. I did explore. I did take a unique journey. I did change lives. It was exciting. It was adventurous. It was lonely. It was lovely. And somehow, I was never afraid, I never altered, I stayed true to myself/ I explored. I absorbed. I choose. And I learned. Oh, how I learned.  It was a path that only I could take based on where I was when I started on this path and what I needed to invite into my life in order to live my fullest.

Your path will be uniquely different because your “take” on life is unique from anyone else’s. Your path will depend on what you need, what you want, what skills and talents you develop, and the choices you make. Continually search out what works just for you. What will you discover if you go exploring? What will you learn? How will you change? Where will you end up? Unimagined adventure lies off the beaten path.

Your current world reflects your past choices

The choices you make today influence what shows up in your experience tomorrow. The form of your present life is the result of the responses, reactions and choices you made along your journey. Your current life experience is based on conscious and unconscious belief systems you have developed over the years.  The manner in which your life unfolds is a combination of what you believe can happen and what you believe you deserve. If your current world needs changing, you must change your own belief system and adjust your expectations. Keep what you like in your world. Tweak what almost works and release what no longer serves you. Your current experience is a reflection of the beliefs and expectations that you currently hold. Is your current world exactly the way you want it to be?

Embrace a freedom of spirit

He is planted in his own integrity, and there he stands, gnarled and knotted, perfectly at ease with himself, his roots deep in truth, his branches held up to let the light in.   Stephen Mitchell, Second book of Tao 19

Oh how I want that to be me! Can you imagine anything more powerful than a person who never wavers from the values she has embraced that make up her own unique truth? How strong. How steady. How inspiring. To stand in your own strength you have to be willing to stand alone. You have to be willing to be different. You have to question everything. You have to deepen your self-awareness. You have to be true to yourself and take full responsibility for everything you say and do and experience. Standing tall in your own integrity is a freedom and it is a responsibility.  Notice how tall you are standing and where you are rooted. If you desire change, go exploring on a less traveled path and see where it leads you.

Question everything

Fortify your personal foundation. How can you evolve your spiritual practice? What qualities are most important to you at this point in your life? How will you cultivate them? Continue to develop the qualities and values you wish to live by. Continue to push boundaries, explore unknown avenues and wander beyond all paths. Embrace the adventures that show up. Explore the choices that appear. Examine and question everything and make only choices that expand your personal potential.

Follow Your Intuition

Intuition is the universal mind in each of us. It is a source of wisdom, and guidance. It is your connection to the natural cycles of life. As you learn to listen to your intuition and trust its guidance, it will help you expand your boundaries, increase your expectations, and teach you the lessons that only you are ready to learn. Watch for the signs and signals that surround you and learn to interpret them. Listen to the insights of your intuition and follow them. Trust your instincts. Be open. Be receptive. Be adventurous.

Allow the way of today to simply be the way of today

“Everything is ready when one is ready. Nothing is ready when one is not ready. Hau Hu Ching, tr. Ni, Hu Ching 78

You can’t go exploring until you notice unexplored paths and you hear them call to you. You can’t decide to pursue an opportunity until you become aware of it. However, you can encourage new paths to open up. Continue to evolve your spiritual practice, practice mindfulness and stillness, encourage your intuition and become more consciously aware in every moment. New doors are always opening. New junctures in your path appear around every choice you make. What you do with an opportunity alters your direction.  Not acting is actually an active choice. You pass someone in the hallway and you speak or you don’t speak. You think about deepening a relationship and you either do or you don’t take action. You consider changing jobs and you start either looking or training for a new one or you keep doing what you’ve been doing. The way of today is whatever it is. Utilize every moment of it.

Embrace your lessons

Everything is a lesson. Every encounter is an opportunity. Every choice leads in a new direction. Every difficulty is a preparation for victory. Begin a gratitude list for the difficulties you have encountered and add to that the lessons you learned and the benefits you have gained from that lesson. When life seems discordant, return to the center, to your inner self, to the peace within. Contemplate what you have learned and consult your intuition before you proceed.

Travel the unexplored path  

My dreams are not dreams of worldly conquest. My dreams take me deeper within. My goal, my vision, my purpose is to sing a deeper song, whatever I figure out that means to me. Moving along my chosen path becomes a very personal journey. The results and affects of the twists and turns I take are unknown until they appear. As I focus my intentions and make my choices based on my beliefs and needs and wants, I find myself on paths I never knew existed. The path I choose takes the wanting and yearning out of my life as I stay ever-present as I journey along my path. My newly discovered path allows me to remove any regret about what was left undone. On my personal path there is only now. And in this now, there is everything. If how I express myself in this world makes a difference in the lives of other people, all the better. However, I know my major work lies deep within on the path I have yet to explore.

Apply your new insights to your life

In order to understand a concept you have to live it. You have to embrace the idea that resonates and figure out how to apply it to your life. As I begin to embrace the diversity of my surroundings, I write to gain understanding of what action I can take to expand my awareness and increase my ability to accept the beauty of unique self-expression. The study I do becomes an interactive connection from the physical plane to the spiritual plane within me. Although the reading stimulates my mind, understanding comes only when I can live the concepts from within.  Every day I practice applying the insights I have discovered. Each day I meditate. Every day I increase my moments of mindfulness. Each day I get better at letting life unfold. It takes practice to incorporate your new insights. It takes patience. It takes perseverance. Go exploring. Take what you want to learn and apply it. That’s how you change.

Reside in your center

Think of one of those magical moments when whatever you are doing is so in alignment that the act is effortless. That is how it feels to be centered. You want to reside in your center. A comment can pull you off center; an unexpected circumstance can put you off balance. Fear, emotions, worries, judgments or anger can jar you away from the serenity that is always present within. Only you can return yourself to the stillness of your center. Avoid circumstances that pull you askew. Cultivate habits and awareness that help you stay in each moment. Learn to monitor your emotions and control them. Abide in the center of your being.

Flow like a river

Be like a leaf floating on the surface of life, enjoy the dips and swirls and trust the current to support you. Be like a cloud floating in the sky with no agenda other than to be. Become the stone standing strong and allow the river of life to flow around you. Be the stream than joins another stream to increase your power.   Flow along in life and embrace whatever shows up.

To wander beyond all paths means being open to change

When you live in the moment, when you simply shape things as they come, you acquire a flow to your being, a serene readiness, and a conscious presence.  Welcome change. Move with the flow. Be mindful. Be accepting. Wander beyond all paths and you will find adventure, knowledge, wisdom, and the new power of being true to yourself.