Before we chose a path, we need to make certain it will take us where we want to go. Before we close a door, we want to make certain it no longer leads somewhere we need to go. Closing one door always opens another.
How to choose which door to close
Too often, we find ourselves banging on a door that will not take us where we need to go. We need to know when to “cut bait.” I have recently closed the door on the senior community where I live. As an inquisitive, productive, esoteric metaphysician, I don’t fit in nor do I find any like-mined people to hang out with. It was frustrating until I figured out I was knocking on the wrong door, I was hanging out with the wrong tribe. It was a relief to shut that door and move into a new tribe.
When one door closes another opens
I went online and now have a most active, supportive, encouraging, like-minded, mind-stretching group of people with whom to interact. I also created my own space where I hold up a flame to attract people to the Deeper Song Community. What doors are still open that you need to close so there is room for a new door to open?
Doors to close include friends to release
Not only do we need to close a few doors, we probably need to release a few friends. As I more consciously define my values and focus my attention, the more difficult it is to find people on a similar path. For instance, because my interests are so specialized, no one in my physical community has a frame of reference for the satisfaction I get from something like figuring out how to get a podcast up on iTunes. My friend’s online understand and appreciate my achievement, and I go there to get support and encouragement from them. How well do your friends support and encourage you? Who do you need to stop spending time with? What friends do you need to release? With whom do you want to establish a stronger, positive, interactive relationship? That’s the door you need to open next.
What doors do I want and need to open?
I am opening doors online, reaching out through 1:1 Skype calls and exchanging emails. And yet, I can go many days without a meaningful in-person exchange even though I live in an apartment setting with people in the halls and activities that gather people. I get to look at that. What door can I open that brings me positive in-person exchanges? One way to find a new door to open is by identifying, allowing and expecting a door to show up. A few days after I realized that I was missing face-to-face positive exchanges, I found a perfect new person and we had a very nurturing and nourishing exchange. Look for doors that contain new friends, new opportunities, new ideas, new clarity, and new understanding. Then open them and go exploring.
Define what you need
What do you need? What doors do you need to open? What doors do you need to close simply because they no longer open to somewhere you want to go?
To Sing a Deeper Song consider:
02– The Hole In Our Life Called Loneliness (podcast)