The postcard from my grandson was a surprise. He acknowledged qualities in me that he respected. And I realized our family does not do that. We do not offer words of appreciation for the ways they express themselves that touches so many hearts, those less tangible qualities of soul and values.
And that’s going to change. Beginning with me.
Do you state the obvious?
Of course, I know my daughter is kind and thoughtful but do I ever tell her that? No. I guess I figure she knows that about herself. Do I tell my son he’s a thoughtful, attentive father? Well, yes I do, on Father’s Day, but…you get the picture.
What do you need to tell someone that you see and admire in them?
Make an acknowledgment list
I keep an acknowledgment list for myself. But I never thought to keep an acknowledgment list for those I care about. What would be on it? I’d tell the social services director here how much I appreciate our occasional philosophical talks. I’d tell my shamanic course partner how much I respect her choice to honor her spiritual calling even when she has an established major presence in medicine. I’d thank my healer friend in California for her ongoing support but I’d also acknowledge her for her perception and healing ability.
See how this unfolds? Look at what people bring into your life, then look beyond that to the gifts they share, and acknowledge those.
Overlook the differences
My grandson said, “I know our intellects are interested in projects of different natures, I nonetheless have tremendous respect for your ongoing passion and enthusiasm.” Acknowledge the differences if you need to, but then acknowledge the gifts, the thoughtfulness that person has extended to you.
Practice
I have to change my thinking in order to do this. I have online conversations with healer friends regularly, and I have to learn to end those conversations with not just a “thank you” but with an acknowledgment of the gifts they have and have offered and have shared.
I may acknowledge a choice they made or an insight they had. I may thank them for a heartfelt share or… I have to look and listen closely to see what I can reflect back to them. I want to hold up a mirror of appreciation so they know how valuable they are.
It’s a matter of changing your thinking and deepening your observation and choosing to say the words.
What kind words of acknowledgment will you say today?
To Sing a Deeper Song Consider: