change

Allow the Right Action to Emerge

March 14, 2016 By Cara Lumen

When the time is right, the action will emerge. We simply have to have patience and trust the process.

Plans force the issues

When you learn to let life unfold, everything shows up at just the right time. The right ideas appear, the perfect circumstances emerge, the best people show up to participate.

When you allow your life to unfold, things simply fall into place and turn out much better than you thought.

Unfolding doesn’t mean you’re not aware. You are vibrantly aware. Aware of the ideas that show up, the situations that present themselves, the people whose words resonate. And then comes the time that you know it’s time to act – to shape the things before you into something much bigger than you could dream of.

Unfolding allows your ideas to mature

Giving a plan time to unfold also allows you to balance yourself. It may mean you become more experienced at a specific skill. You may have time to take some tutorials that spark new interpretations of your original idea.

Unfolding doesn’t mean a specific amount of time; it simply means a patient waiting to allow your ideas to develop and mature. To allow yourself time to absorb the idea and let your inner wisdom check it out.

With patience comes the right action

It comes so smoothly that it’s effortless. Everything lines up, and it “becomes.” It becomes more than you thought possible. It becomes more impactful, more clear, more relevant.

Learn to listen to your inner guidance. Learn to recognize the right time to move – that magical time when everything comes together to turn into something more amazing than you ever thought possible.

Learn to allow the right action to emerge.

To Sing a Deeper Song consider:

Unleash The Power of Your Passion and Calling
Unfolding an the Wu Wei of Not-Forcing
Unfolding an the Wu Wei of Not-Obstructing
Unfolding and the Wu Wei of Not-Interfering
Engage in the Power of trust
You Know More Than You Think You Do
How To Cultivate the power of Simplicity
27 – Why Have You Been Chosen
28 – How to Walk Beside Someone in Service
29-Are You Wiling to Move Beyond Your Comfort Zone?

Just Choose

February 29, 2016 By Cara Lumen

Go left, go right, go forward, go back – every moment is filled with decisions. Stay seated, stand up, make a choice. Huge relief comes with making a choice. It’s like releasing a log jam. You can finally move. Just because you finally made a choice.

Not making a choice is a choice

Not making a choice is the most limiting thing you can do. Nothing happens if you don’t put the ball into play, if you don’t pick one direction or another to at least start moving forward. The choice may only be to learn a little more about the change you’re considering. Make certain you aren’t stuck simply because you will not make any choice at all.

A choice helps you go adventuring

You don’t have to continue to go in the direction you chose, but you do have to go exploring in that direction – far enough so that you have enough information for an informed decision. You have to explore far enough that you have knowledge of the skills you will need and an idea how you might acquire them. Making a choice is exciting. It opens new doors and new possibilities.

A choice lets you experience results

I made a choice to set my new Rainmaker site up as a membership site. It took some work and it looked great, and after the initial sign-ups that took place when I first opened my site, it didn’t continue to attract more members. I didn’t have the time or inclination to make a lot of courses and promote them and all the things that go with taking care of a membership group. I tried it. I explored it. I discovered its limitations for how I wanted to work. My informed decision was to take down the membership site.

A choice lets you change directions

In the process of doing my end-of-year reality check, I decided to make another choice, one that would change the call to action for those who come to my site. As it’s easy to change themes in Rainmaker, I found a new theme that felt right for where I am right now. In particular, it had a most lovely opt-in form for people to sign up to be connected. We’ll see what happens, but this new choice allows me to approach people more gently.

Let your “why” determine your choice

Why are you doing what you’re doing? Why will others want what you offer? I bet that since you’ve gotten better at what you do over the past year, you have new ideas and opportunities to offer. For that same reason, your target community has shifted and grown. A close look at your “why” can help you make an informed choice.

For instance, a year ago all I knew was that I wanted to help people sing a deeper song. I had no clear idea what that looked like or felt like, but I went exploring and shared what I discovered.

Recently I rewrote my “why.” It has become more specific and more tangible. I help people who want to sing a deeper song to understand their passion, their gifts and their calling so that they’re confident they’re the only ones who can deliver the message they’re called to share.

Look how specific that is, how rich the results I can help us all achieve. Re-examine your “why” on a regular basis to catch the subtle changes in focus.

Do too many choices feel a bit overwhelming?

Keep your over-arching purpose in mind and, with each choice you consider, measure it against how far it’ll advance your main purpose. My main purpose is to sing a deeper song and help others do the same. As I explore the ways to help people share the message only they can share, it focuses my choices and my work.

Are you serving beginners or advanced?

What degree of expertise do you want the people you serve to have? I like the advanced group myself and I need to know that, because it colors all my choices. Yes, I have to explain some basics, but the choice of companions is determined by the degree of skill it takes to follow a particular path. What level of seeker do you serve?

Keep your personal balance

I have made one video and I loved doing it. I have seven more scripts written and I’m still putting off taking the next step. First, I have to learn the video-editing program. I bet that will only take an hour. That’s the not-knowing-how boulder that sits in front of me!

Once I make the choice to take one step toward learning the program, that big boulder will become smaller boulders that I can step around and thus move forward. Make a small choice if you need to, just to get yourself moving. And don’t forget to applaud the results – that you did, in fact, learn to take a new step.

Allow the timing to unfold

Letting the timing unfold is tricky. Choice takes contemplation. It takes exploration. Before I switched the focus of my web site, I had been thinking about it, looking for the underlying focus I needed to find. A lot of work happened subconsciously because one day I simply did it – change my theme and figured out how to put html in the opt in form Yes, I got stuck. Yes, I read a lot of directions. And YES I DID IT!

How do you make a choice?

Are you a pros and cons list maker? That’s a mental exercise that can help you test your feelings around a particular choice.

Do you make a choice and wander down the path a bit to test it out? When you explore, you broaden your frame of reference whether you continue in that direction or not.

Do you need to learn or strengthen a particular skill? I spend 20 minutes a day on a tutorial that increases my expertise in a program or a topic.

Do you need to re-identify your core purpose before you move forward to see how you have changed? Perhaps your reluctance to move forward is because your wants and needs have changed. Take a moment to see if you’re still going in the direction you want to go.

Whatever the methodology you choose for this, just do it. Don’t stay stuck. Just decide!

To Sing a Deeper Song consider:

04–How to Redefine Yourself and the 30 Year Plan
05-Do You Have the Courage to Stand Alone
07- How to Find and Express Your Distinctive Voice
08- How Willing Are You to Change – And Why Not?
20 – Why Are You in Service?
How to Plan in Unfolding Cycles
Wander Beyond All Paths
What Do You Do in a Losing Situation?
Unfolding and the Big Bouder
Where Do You Find the Support You Need?
What to Do When You Feel Disheartened

Are You Too Old to Change?

July 7, 2015 By Cara Lumen

The worst words you can say to yourself are “I’ve always done it that way.” It’s a killer. It stops your imagination. It stops awareness. It stops personal growth. Is that what you really want?

What unconditional positions are holding you back?

A neighbor said she found it hard to cook for one. I suggested she make a big pot of something to cover several meals and she said, “I never eat leftovers.” What happened to a soup getting better the second day as the flavors blend? What happened to being able to freeze individual portions of healthy food for yourself? Her unconditional position left absolutely no room for change.

Another neighbor said, “We learned how to eat as children. There is nothing we need to learn now.” As children, there were not genetically modified foods or pesticide riddled crops to the degree there are now. There is always something new to learn because life changes.

Look carefully at the unconditional positions you hold dear. Are you willing to reexamine and rethink your beliefs in order to move forward from where you are?

What has changed about your life that requires adjustment?

How has your financial position evolved? How does that affect your spending habits? How has your health and stamina changed? How has that affected your activity? How have your relationships evolved? Who is in your life that is supportive and who do you need to stop allowing around you? Life changes, circumstances change. That means we need to change. We need to be willing to adjust our response to the circumstances that show up in our life. There is always something new to learn and explore. Never consider yourself too old to change.

What belief can you release?

Look carefully at the underlying beliefs that hold you in place. What do you think you can still accomplish? Have your goals gotten smaller? Give yourself permission to think big again. What do you think is possible? Look for the beliefs you hold that are keeping you stuck in place.

Stay strong in your difference

I am surrounded by people who think that to age is to deteriorate. That’s not my belief. I find support and encouragement in my belief on the internet. Although I have been a vegetarian for 40 years I am now a vegan. It meant I gave up dairy (I was eating yogurt every day), cheese (I had just discovered Parmigiano-Reggiano) and butter (I did find a great substitute). I tried to bake without eggs and had odd outcomes. I learned that my taste buds can be changed in eight days and soon found that most things I ate elsewhere were too salty or too sweet. I cut back on sugar. I could no longer bring myself to dump a lot of sugar into a bowl and plan to eat the resulting cookies over a three-day period. I gathered concepts, recipes, and encouragement from my like-minded fellow plant-based eaters online. I’m changing and I’m have a great time exploring the new possibilities.

Vegans are only about 14% of the population so this personal choice sets me apart from the people in my community. The fact that I am a metaphysician studying Taoism makes me even less aligned with my present community, but these are my choices. It is my path to explore, my results to achieve. As you make your personal choices celebrate your uniqueness and stay strong in your difference?

How do want this next part of your life to be?

When I was in business, I had plans, steps to take and goals to achieve. In retirement, I get to design this next part of my life and I need a focus. This current cycle of my life is about introspection and figuring out how I can continue to feel relevant in my life as it unfolds today. I need some qualities by which to measure my progress. I have two objectives: one is to deepen my spirituality and the other is to feel relevant. I want to feel I am contributing to others. I measure the success of my days though my expressions of serenity, mindfulness and letting life and circumstance unfold. It’s a tranquil way of life and I’m learning as I go. I have found a relevant way to participate. How do you picture this next part of your life? How will you stay productive? What do you want to accomplish? What is the focus of this next cycle of your life?

How are you willing to change?

Why are people unwilling to change? Are they too lazy, too uninspired, too complacent? Or are they no longer aware they have a choice? Where is the fire, the curiosity, the desire to keep learning? If you’ve lost that, how do you get it back?

Change is made one moment at a time

One choice in any given moment can make a difference. What happens if you stop yourself from a negative comment? How will that change the outcome of your conversation? What happens if you learn to listen to what the people are saying behind their words? What insights will you gain? How will your response change? In an instant, you can decide to change. Maybe you choose a carrot instead of a cookie, walk an extra half block, or give the next person you see a compliment. In an instant, you can create change by the way you think, and the way you act.

Change is an attitude

You are surrounded by change. You are immersed in change. Every moment is an opportunity to make a different choice, act in a different manner, or turn in a different direction. Being old is not an excuse for being opinionated, rude, or unresponsive. It certainly is not an excuse to refuse to change and grow. Old is an opportunity to reflect, to deepen your spiritual connection, and to try to live a kinder life than you had the time or consciousness to live before. Don’t use age as an excuse. Cherish it as an opportunity to change.

To Sing a Deeper Song Consider

04–How to Redefine Yourself and the 30 Year Plan (podcast, 20 minutes)

11-Do You Need a New Tribe? (podcast, 20 minutes)

if I Were a Person Who…

The Cycle of Moving Forward

The Clarity of Starting Over

Wander Beyond All Paths

The Shedding Of Your Skin

Why You Need To Learn to Change

How to Creative Fertile Field for Positive Change

How To Identify and Release Your Restrictive Ways

The Awkward Space in Changing Tribes

April 7, 2015 By Cara Lumen

I’m in the process of changing tribes and I’m watching what happens during the shift. How I feel about letting go of the familiar that no longer works and what I am doing to reach out to embrace the new community. There is a sense of loss and a sense of anticipation.

The old tribe does not work

It took me awhile to figure out I was in the wrong tribe. I didn’t fit in. What’s more, I didn’t WANT to fit in because our ideas and interests are so different. In my old tribe, I could not share my excitement of discovery, the satisfaction of my recent accomplishments or engage in an in-depth conversation. I need all of that in my life. It was a huge relief to acknowledge that I needed a new tribe and let go of the one that no longer worked for me.

How to make your way through the emotional exit

My emotional exit has been gradual. I simply filled up my time doing more work with my new online course communities. Recently two remaining ties to the community were severed and there was some emotion attached to this final letting go of the old tribe. Someone volunteered to take over my position as substitute secretary for the Resident’s Association. That freed me from attending any meetings or events that didn’t interest me. In addition, the editor of the community newsletter where I have been serving as Associate Editor for four years wants to make the newsletter smaller. I realized I’m ready to give that up too. I have many forms of writing projects going to nurture my new tribe. The new tribe is exceedingly receptive to what I share. I know I’m on the right track because the universe offered ways for me to release these two remaining ties. Now I am looking at what I want to do about the physical isolation as I choose not to interact in the community in which I live while also looking forward to the satisfaction and encouragement I am getting online. That’s the betwixt and between – the awkward space in changing tribes.

Are you filing yourself up with what counts?

When you release one thing, you make room for another. As my life fills with writing courses and producing podcasts and having 1:1 conversations with members of the Deeper Song Community I am awesomely happy. I am encouraged, appreciated, and inspired by members of my new tribe. I’m happier than I’ve been a long, long time. All because I’m in the right place for me at this time in my life.

What do you need to release in order to make room for what you want?

You may need to move away from a particular non-supportive friend. You may be dissatisfied with part of your job or maybe the whole job no longer excites and nurtures you. We change. Our interests change. We learn new skills, we develop new passions. That means our choices need to change too.

What, exactly, do you need to change? How will you go about doing that? Are you willing to move through the awkward space that comes when changing tribes?

To Sing a Deeper Song consider:

When People Don’t Understand Your Passion

Do You Need a New Tribe

Why You Need To Learn to Change

How Have Your Parameters Changed?

How To Identify and Release Your Restrictive Ways

Letting Go is the Hardest Part of Change

September 23, 2014 By Cara Lumen

If you don’t let go of the side of the pool you’ll never learn to swim. If you don’t put down all the packages you are carrying, you cannot pick up anything new. Letting go is the hardest part of change. It is also the most liberating.

Letting go is freeing

I just forwarded the website that carries my name to my blog. That means that caralumen.com no longer exists. It is forwardedto my blog www.passionatelyonpurpose.com. All my work, all my years as a content development coach are no longer there. It’s like erasing yourself, removing a major record of your past. I’m moving on and I had to let go. My work is on my blog and it has been established there for some time.

Let go when you can no longer fix or support the past

My web site was in DreamWeaver. My blog is in WordPress. WordPress is more flexible, more agile, more current and easier for me to work. And I love to blog. My original web presence no longer represents who I am or where I am going. It is so much easier to let it go and start fresh. I took down books I’ve written over the years that probably no longer represent what I think. What I offer now is relevant to my current work.

Letting go opens new possibilities

The feeling of letting go of this web site is like suddenly dropping a heavy burden. I don’t have time to go fix the old site or tweak it or update it. I now spend my time on moving my blog forward. I can totally focus on developing a new cycle with a slightly difference offering. The path ahead is open and full of possibilities.

Letting go means, you are moving on at last

It soooo hurts to let go of my past identity. I’ve been redefining myself since I moved into semi-retirement. If I am no longer what my work is, who am I? What is my new work? What is my new focus? How can I continue to feel relevant and useful? The repositioning I am now doing on my blog will allow me to explore new venues and offer new services.

The decision to let go happens in an instant

When it’s time to let go it feels like releasing the string of a helium balloon, it is done in seconds. My prompt was when I signed up for a master blogging class. I knew that people I didn’t know would be looking at my site. I knew I had to forward my old site. Within a half hour it was done. I worked for the next three days writing a new landing page that defines my current purpose. I reformatted all thepages on my blog. I discarded pages and product. I learned to use WordPress more effectively. The decision was made easily. The execution took focused time. But the freedom is very worth it.)

Your vision of the future improves

Once you let go of something, once you are free of the back and forth considerations of when and how and if to let go, you are free to focus on the path ahead. You are free to tune into the rising energy of the day and let it take you where it will. A load is lifted. You can stand tall. You can walk freely. A new adventure begins because you have finally let go.

Small or large – just let something go.

I noticed how hard this was because it felt so big. It was something I considered two years ago but was not ready to do. Honor your own timing but let go of something. Change your focus and look in the direction you want to go next. Take with you only what you need to reach that destination. Leave the rest behind. It is the voice of your past. Live in the present.