Cara Lumen | Sing a Deeper Song

Sing a Deeper Song

change

How Have Your Parameters Changed?

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Each phase of our life is defined by new parameters. Those parameters come from our own beliefs and actions and can be expanded through the choices we make. “Parameter” means limitation, restraint, and restriction. I don’t want any of those. Do you?

The growing old parameter

The majority of people believe that when you grow old, you diminish in physical capacity. You get sick and you die. Because we look for that diminished capacity, that is what we see. However, when you take time to look around, there are plenty of people who are active and productive as well as old. Which would you rather be? Change what you believe is possible and it becomes your experience.

You location parameter

As I examined this idea of parameters, my first thought was that some of my parameters are defined by my physical location, by this apartment, this community, this town. I have no plans to move. I’m tucked into an environment that nourishes me. I love the birch tree outside my window, the panoramic view of the clouds, the birds surrounding my birdfeeder, and the possessions I choose to surround myself with. Out of all these location parameters, the one thing that is easy to change is what possessions I keep around me and how if I will allow my stuff to crowd me. Ah ha, that’s a choice to make about my location parameter.

Your health parameter

Would you rather take medicine or balance your body with healthy food choices? It amazes me that many people in this senior population are content to stuff pills into their bodies and never consider how simply choosing a plant-based diet might let them move back to better health. They don’t want to be bothered to change. I’ve gone from Vegetarian to Vegan and on to no sugar and I’m finally losing weight I’ve carried for years. I want to be healthy. I want to stay healthy. The degree of my health is a parameter I can pro-actively change.

Would you rather sit in a chair all day or learn a Qi Gong practice that will balance your body? Sitting is very bad for you yet we are not willing to make any effort to find a form of movement that supports the flexibility and strength of our bodies. The idea that the movement of the Qi energy in your body determines your well-being is a Chinese concept. Although I spent years doing yoga, a year learning T’ai Chi, and ten years doing Falun Gong, the four months I’ve been doing Zhan Zhaung Qi Gong is making a huge difference in the strength and flexibility of my body. Find what works for you and make it a part of your plan. Expand the parameters of your health and flexibility.

Some parameters are easily expanded

My most cherished gift is my mind. It leads me down fascinating paths of discovery, it entertains me, it offers insights and understanding. My parameters expand with my mind as I learn things I never knew before and tried things I’ve never done before. The internet is filled with things I don’t know. I can explore to my heart’s content. My mind profoundly expands my parameters.

The parameters I have the most control over lie in my attitude and beliefs. I can learn to be less judgmental. I can learn to be more curious. I can change my beliefs as I stay open to new concepts and insights and then make up my own mind. I can be proactive through the internet. I can find like-minded people online that are not present in my physical surroundings. What attitude and beliefs are confining your parameter and which ones are you ready to change?

Increase the parameter of your expectation

What you expect you get. If you expect it to be hard, it will be. If you expect it to be easy, it will be. If you expect it to be possible, it will be. Look carefully at what you think can happen and expand the parameters of what you expect to happen.

Take charge of your parameters

As I moved into retirement, my parameters changed so dramatically that I am still finding my balance. It helps me to know that I still have control over every facet of my life: what I think, what I believe, what I choose to do. What are your parameters for this phase of your life and what are you going to do to expand them?

Note: The Qi Gong form I find so powerful can be found in The Way of Energy: Mastering the Chinese Art of Internal Strength with Chi Kung Exercise (A Gaia Original)

The Road Taken, the Choices Made

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“Everything we do in life forms a road” says Deng Ming-Dao in Everyday Tao.  We determine our personal path by the choices we make. Our paths may cross, we may even walk a ways together, but we are not walking in each other’s footsteps and at some point, we go our separate ways. “You can only progress by building on the distance you have come.”

You can’t go back

You can’t start over.  It is useless to have regrets about what did or didn’t happen.  What’s done, is done. You cannot take a different fork in the road, your past cannot be changed.  What you have is the present and the lessons you learned by the choices you made. That is where you begin.  “Now” is the foundation upon which you build this next part of your journey.

You did your best in that moment

Whatever choices you made were determined in the moment by what you knew, what you believed, who you were and what you needed.  For better or worse, you made a choice.  If you gave thought to your choice and it seemed right at the time, you did what you should have done.  Don’t look back.  If you followed your intuition, or acted on impulse, that was the right choice at the time. Don’t wish you could change it. The choices you made are what makes you who you are in this moment.  Mistakes were your lessons.  Accomplishments built your self-esteem.  All the choices you have made in your lifetime have gone into making the present You.

You constantly choose your destiny

“Just by choosing where you stand, you alter your destiny,” explains Deng Ming-Dao in 365 Tao Daily Meditations.  “Those who follow Tao define destiny as the course or pattern of your life as it spontaneously takes shape.” Spontaneously takes shape – in the moment – not something predestined, not some goal we set out to achieve.  Our destiny is shaped by the choices we make in each moment, whether it is a spontaneous response or a choice built on past experience and foundational values.  Your past choices were influenced by your personality, how you related to your parents and siblings, where you went to school, what job you took, what relationships you had, who your friends are, how you spend your days. Every choice affects your destiny.  Destiny is not a place further ahead, destiny is in this very moment of choice.

Your choices built your foundation

If you let go of everything in this moment, what would you have left?  You would have your values, your experience, and your beliefs. You would have the skills and knowledge you have accumulated.  You would have the strength and awareness you have gradually achieved over your lifetime.  You stand on an individulized foundation upon which to build this next portion of your personal journey. Go forward from here and now.

The only reason to look back is to clarify your lessons

I recently ran across a Gratitude Book I once kept.  In it, I had written the positive things people said about me.  I was amazed and bolstered when it’s content reminded  me how positively some people saw me.  I had forgotten how I was perceived.  I had even forgotten some of the valuable ways I had contributed. It increased my self-confidence and even reminded me of ways I used to serve. But that was then.  This is now. Don’t dwell on the past, simply take its lessons and its praise and move on from here.

Make conscious choices

When I desire to gain personal clarity, I sit down and actively take stock of what I have going for me and what I’d like to change. I take a “Tao Tally” in which I answer three questions: What has shifted for me this week? What insights have I gained? What will I focus on the coming week? That focus is usually a quality like unfolding, mindfulness, compassion, serenity, something intangible but with the capacity to guide the choices I make.

Allow your life to spontaneously unfold

Your life is not predestined; it is determined by each choice you make. That means you can change direction in any moment simply by the choice you make in your words and actions.

Believe the Road Beneath You

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You are where you are because you thought the thoughts you thought, took the actions you took, and expected the outcome that you did. Are you happy where you are?  Are there changes you want to make?  Look closely at your present surroundings.  They tell you what you believe you deserve and what you believe is possible.

Where have you landed?

The past is over and done, it cannot be changed.  However, when you subjectively examine the past, it can help you understand the present.  What you did in the past has created what you are experiencing today.  The past, therefore, holds clues about what to do and what not to do to create more of the same.  This holds true for both the good stuff and the less-than-good stuff.

What is now present in your life that you love?  What did you do to attract that to you?  What is currently present in your life that you wish would go away?  What could you stop doing that would allow it to leave?  You are where you are at this moment because of your choices.  And your choices will take you where you want to go next.

It’s not about the future – yet

Your choice in this moment is to look for what you like about your life so you can attract more of it to you.  I like my apartment. I love my cats.  I have good friends. I enjoy the tree outside my window and the birdfeeders I’ve set up that attract an eclectic following.  I love the clouds with their constantly shifting beauty and the ever-changing sunsets.  When I focus on those elements of my world, I feel content and grateful for their existence.  What you focus on you attract.  What are you focusing on?

What would you like to change about your current life? I’d like to be stronger and slimmer.  I’d like to be more comfortable in social situations.  I’d like to be more patient with people.  When I keep those goals in mind, each day bring me the opportunity to make the changes in my thinking and my attitude that will bring about the changes I desire.  I learn to let go of wants and wishes and desires and take pleasure from what I have.

Each day, examine the road beneath you

Each day is a fresh opportunity.  Each day holds the potential for positive change.  Each day holds the prospect of changing the road beneath you.

As part of my daily inner work, I give gratitude for the gifts I have been given and the lessons I have learned.  I notice how the road I am on is changing.  The day I figured out how to avoid conflict simply by understanding what was truly important to me changed  my direction for all the days to come. The few days I spent writing articles about the difference between allowing things to unfold and simply being lazy, helped me make peace with the unfolding process and brought new awareness I can teach others.  It changed my direction.

Believe the road beneath you

You are meant to be exactly where you are.  You asked for it with your attitudes and beliefs and actions. However, you have a choice to shift the attitudes, beliefs and actions that got you there.  It’s as easy as making a slight shift of a steering wheel, a small correction in your course.  That shift can happen in an instant.

Look at the road beneath you.  Your thoughts and beliefs got you here.  Do you like where you are right now and if not, what are you going to do about it?

I Want to Sing a Deeper Song

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In The Prophet, Kahlil Gibran wrote of returning to “sing a deeper song” and I wondered what that meant to me.

Do you understand your “song”?

My personal song comes from my love of learning and a deep desire to share what I learn with others.  My song has led me on many adventures.  Some of them were side trips; some carried me along in my own personal direction. Always my path has been about learning and enthusiastically sharing what I learned. Our songs change over the years but if you look deeply you will see an underlying theme to your personal song.

I have changed my “tune”

I’ve been moving through major change, one of retirement and searching for relevance and meaning and a place of service in that new status.  I’m no longer in the coaching business, but I am still writing.  The topic of my writing has changed, which means my tune has changed. At the core, I am still true to my values and my beliefs.  How and where I share them has shifted.

What “deeper” means to me

The word “deeper” for me means to go deeper within, to connect more deeply with Tao, and to bring that understanding and connection into my life.  This exploration of what lies beneath the surface will change the song I sing and maybe even the way I sing it. My sense of “deeper” is within, not without. “Deeper” could be interpreted as delving more deeply into a topic on the physical plane.  Scientists look deeply into something outside themselves for answers but they use their inner intuition to guide their explorations.  Songwriters look deeply within themselves to express feelings that are shared by others.  Business people can keep their values present in all their dealings. What does “deeper” mean to you?

How do I go “deeper?”

In Stephen Mitchell’s translation of the Tao Te Ching (67), he says, “Simple in actions and in thoughts,
you return to the source of being.”

Rumi in “Tending Two Shops” says, “Live in the nowhere that you came from, even though you have an address here.”

Create time for stillness and contemplation

We must listen to what we understand in the silence and put it in action in our daily lives.  We can study, but we must always be aware that words both reveal and conceal.  We can learn to interpret what we feel on our subtle levels.  We can trust our intuition.  We can allow the tears to come when we find something that touches our heart.  We can arrange our environment to remind us to be with the stillness within. We can meditate.  We can read the ideas of others that feel meaningful to us and apply what appeals to our own life.  How do you create time for stillness and contemplation in your daily life?

Live a mindful life

My first step in “singing a deeper song” is awareness.  I work to be present in the moment.  I work to stay mindful of my words and actions.  I take time to reflect – on my day, my life, on nature, and life.  I identify the values I choose to guide me.  I measure my actions to see that I am living close to those values.  I observe my physical plane self.  I inhabit my inner plane self.

I “sing” about what I discover

Whether through my actions, my words, my deeds, my writing, or my presence, I constantly sing my song.  When I am in tune with life it is a great song.  When I go exploring in an article like this, it is an inquisitive song.  What does your song sound like to others?

Rumi says, “When you do things from the soul, the river itself moves through you.  Freshness and a deep joy are signs of the current.”

Deeper is relative

“Going deeper” is relative. You start with where you are.  You add some actions to your life that you feel will take you deeper.  Don’t compare your “deepness” with someone else’s.  We are each where we should be.  We each have a different section of “depth” to explore.  We each will express our deeper song in our own unique manner.

How are you working to sing a deeper song?

How Do You Create Change?

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There is only one way to make change in this country, when each of us takes personal responsibility to change the life around us. We don’t need a stalled Congress to tell us what to do. We don’t need to sit around and wait for someone to fix our lives for us. We have the power to change our lives instantly through our choices, our words and our actions. That’s how we create change.

Begin with the world around you

What do you need to do to change the life around you? Do you need to learn something new in order to contribute more at work? Do you need to give more thought to how to interact with those around you? Will you help others move forward? What about spending more time preparing nutritious meals so you and your family do not contribute to the obesity statistic? What about the environment you live in? Will you walk softly on our planet earth by recycling, conserving, and living simply? Begin making change right where you are. Make changes in your thinking, in your words, in your expectations. Change how you live your life. Become an example of your own values. Inspire by being an example of what you believe. Whether you choose a 1:1 interaction or find yourself in front of an organization of like-minded people, identify a part of your world you have the ability to change and set about changing it.

Change something important to you

What pleases you the most? Go tell more people about it. What creates problems for you? How could that problem be solved? Take steps to help change your world for the better. People are rallying around the Made in America campaign. Others are educating their community about Global Warming and the impact each person can make. Maybe your concern is the lives of the poor, or undereducated, or people with special needs. You may become a champion for animal rights. What is important to you and how will you personally help create change?

Use education as a cornerstone for change

When you see a problem, look for a solution you can offer. Educate yourself to the nuances of a situation you want to change. Give deep thought to what you would like to see it become. What is possible? What will help create change? Go exploring and find out what others are doing. When you find a solution that aligns with your personal values, implement it. If you see that your approach has exceptional value, set about to make it happen. Educate others. This is not about talking them into your point of view. It is about giving them enough information to make an informed decision. If you find they are like-minded, you can show them how they can take action, how they can be a part of making change in the world. How will you set about educating yourself and others so a change will occur?

Make change in your community

If three people in a community got together to figure out how to solve a problem simply because the problem exists and they have a strong desire to turn it into an asset rather than a liability, they would be a catalyst for change. They would sit down at a table and brainstorm. They would find ways to mini-test their ideas. Once they have a plan, they share it with people who can implement it on a larger scale. Try out your idea in your own community. If it works, other communities will copy it. They may adapt it and make it better. That’s how ideas spread, from person to person, from action to action. You can be a part of that.

Create action around your passion

What do you care about enough to want to help it change for the better? What are you living through that your understanding of it, if shared, will make it easier for someone else to move through the same process? Do you see a solution to a nation-wide problem that you can develop and experiment with on a local level and then offer to other communities that are in a position to put it in action? I’m not talking politics here, I’m talking person to person, creating collaborations in order to test and expand an idea. Maybe you start your own company around your idea. Maybe you create it and gift it to the world. Identifying a solution and offering it as an action step can change the world around you.

Become an entrepreneur to the world

Entrepreneurs have the ability to see new ways to do things. Apply that creative ability to community and national problems. Whether you start a non-profit to make a difference in your community or go work in a company that is making a difference or give money to a cause you support, find something you care about and help advance its cause.

Let change come from you

How would you fix the budget? How would you improve education? How would you care for the planet? How would you end obesity? You begin with yourself and those in your circle of influence. You get yourself out of debt and stay solvent. You begin to live more simply, with more awareness and gratitude. You go online, learn something new, and teach your children to do the same. You insist on pesticide-free and preservative free food. You limit your consumption, actively conserve energy and recycle what you use. You educate yourself about healthy nutrition and provide it for those around you. Then you find a few friends to join with you to educate others in what you have found. You can change the world, one person at a time, one thought at time.

How will you make a difference?