personal growth

Ya Gotta Do What Ya Gotta Do

February 3, 2010 By Cara Lumen

Don’t you love your intuition – that inner knowing that helps you make decisions? When I decided to move from California to be around my family in Kansas I decided in a nano-second. There was a knowing, a certainty that it was the perfect step to take. And within two hours I had given notice to my landlord, called my daughter to say I was coming and got on line to check out places to live. That kind of certainty makes decision making easy.

But what if you are not so sure?

Cultivate your inner knowing
You need to learn to trust your inner wisdom. So check it out. Listen to those silent words you hear, or the sudden feeling that gives you a clue, and test it out. Keep testing until you are comfortable with how you are interpreting those signs.

Ask for signs
I love this one because it’s rather like going on an adventure. Ask the Universe for a sign that the step you are considering is the right one and watch what happens. Periodically I have to say, “OK Universe, what am I to do now?” And I read something that gives me a great idea, or I talk to someone on the phone and explain something to them and there is my answer, or someone is explaining their thoughts and I get the one that’s applicable to me.

Know what you really want
If you keep looking deep enough you’ll find what is at the core of your passion. I have gotten as far as learning and teaching as my passion but beneath that is a need to organize – thoughts, ideas, learning procedures. And one of the signs I keep getting is people asking me to create exercises for their books. I create great systems for myself and I share them with others in my courses and in my coaching. My latest thought is to make a collection of worksheets that simplify and clarify any project. Keep defining your passion and see what others recognize in you. You have to know what you are good at but you have to be willing to experiment and keep trying things until you find a way to make it work.

Do your research
Sometimes we can’t take a step because we don’t have enough information. Gathering information doesn’t mean you have to do it, it simply means you can make an informed decision. Go exploring. Get more information. Find out what others are doing. See what you can offer that other’s are not. See if what you find appeals to you. What do you want to do? What do you want to offer? What are you not willing to do? Listen to your intuition and inner knowing and follow your passion. Then make your choice.

Take action
Nothing’s going to happen if you don’t start. Make an outline, devise some steps. Start. Take one step at a time. Remember that business is a series of projects so divide your idea into measurable steps and congratulate yourself when you get one completed.

Do what ya gotta do
Life is a series of choices. The more aware we are of our passion, our desires, and our strengths, the more on-target our choices will be. Look, listen and choose and go do what ya gotta do.

How Much Bigger Can You Think?

December 17, 2009 By Cara Lumen

by Cara Lumen

I sat down to mind-map the next four years and couldn’t do it – I could get part way through this year but only very slightly into next. And forget any years after that. I had no idea what I wanted or what I could expect.

I wanted to think bigger but I only did a fair job of it. It was easy to write down the things I had already thought of to do this year.

Then I tried to see where some of those would take me next year, what new doors they would open up, what new people they would attract and I realized that I have to let it happen organically.

What I can do is be very aware. Aware of the new ideas I have. Aware of people who respond to me and might make a potential collaborative partner. Aware of what new skill I have learned and how I might use it to make something new. Aware of changes in the world that affect my target audience. And most of all to be aware of the signs and signals of new possibilities that come my way all the time.

The one trick to thinking bigger is to move your thoughts outside the perceived reality of the physical plane and the limitations we know here. If you have an idea and think it will cost too much or take too much time, or maybe you don’t have what it takes to do it, that’s physical plane thinking. That’s trying to figure out how to do it the human way. To really expand your thinking you have to cut that tie to the physical plane and let your imagination soar in the realm of infinite possibility – where anything and everything is possible. You can do that with visioning. You can do that with daydreaming. You can do that in your dreams. Trust what you discover through your inner knowing. If you can think it up you can do it. Keep expanding your thinking and push the boundaries of what you think is possible. That will help you think bigger than you thought you could..

Do You Give the Gift of Gracious Receiving?

December 13, 2009 By Cara Lumen

by Cara Lumen

As I watch the people around me prepare gifts for others, I realize how important the moment of acceptance is. Do you take a long time unwrapping your present, noticing and admiring the wrapping and the bow and the care that was taken to make the gift packaging beautiful? Whatever is inside, do you truly let it touch your heart and feel the love behind the gift, tune into the person who gave it to you and appreciate the time and the thought and the choice that went into it?

A long time ago when I was in theatre someone came up to a friend of mine and complemented him on his performance. He said, “I could have done better.” I later pointed out how that negated the person making the observations. When someone gives you a compliment let it sink in and then acknowledge it with a simple “thank you.”

In New York City years ago in an est communication seminar exercise we sat in chairs opposite each other and took turns giving the other person compliments even though we didn’t know each other. It was interesting to see how I stopped those compliments from coming in, from really feeling them and accepting them, from believing them. If you can’t feel and accept the compliments that come your way, how will you ever feel nourished, or worthy, or appreciated or any of the great ways you feel when people give you a positive comment.

I keep all the nice things people say about me in an Acknowledgement List on my computer. Whether it’s a short line in an email or a whole testimonial which ends up on my web site, I keep them in one place and periodically read them to give myself a personal acceptance boost and to see how I’m doing – how others see me and if I’m touching hearts like I want to be. Since I appreciate being acknowledged so much I’m going to be better about acknowledging others this coming year.

This holiday season, surrounded with family that I have not been around for awhile, I’m going to pay attention to the anticipation of the gift giver, the expectation of the gift receiver, and the lovely joy of acknowledging and being acknowledged. I’m going to soak it in and give a lot of it back out.

So in the spirit of giving and receiving, I want to thank you for being a part of my community, for reading some of my posts and articles, for coming to some of my teleclasses, for letting me participate in your business as a coach partner, for being a peer mentor and a friend. I am grateful for each of you and very glad to have you in my life.

May your holiday be filled with love and gracious acceptance.

Purposeful Acts of Kindness

December 10, 2009 By Cara Lumen

by Cara Lumen

Her co-worker had just separated from his wife. She went with him to the doctor and then offered her home for his recuperation because he had no place else to go. Her husband went with that co-worker when he had his surgery and spent the night at the hospital with him so he would have an advocate there. Those are not random acts of kindness that’s purposeful kindness, the kindness I find myself surrounded with here in the mid-west.

At the store I was looking at a 40 pound box of cat litter wondering how to get it in my cart when a young woman stopped to help me. I hadn’t asked. She just saw my need and addressed it. At the grocery store I asked the Sara Lee delivery man for a product that turned out his company didn’t make. He even went over to the racks to help me look. It wasn’t there. So I just continued down the next aisle. A few minutes later there he was with two varieties of the product in his hand. I was totally touched by his kindness and we semi-hugged. I think he was touched by my being touched. A young man in my building helped me get my laundry up the stairs. And my niece who unexpectedly helped me find a government building I was having a hard time locating and it took a lot of pressure off of me. I have never before been so surrounded with purposeful acts of kindness – organic acts of kindness.

It has made me stop to see how I measure up in thoughtfulness. I may no longer be able to step in and lift something, or tall enough to reach a high shelf for someone, but there are other things. I can write these posts and hope they inspire someosne. I can write thoughtful comments and acknowledgements to people I interact with. I did recently rescue a mother cat and four black kittens that someone left in a box on the second floor landing outside of my apartment. I was new in town and had to go find the humane society to help them be safe. Sometimes it may be as small a kindness as a cheery word on a gloomy day, or a sincere thank you to the checkout clerk.

I have added something new to my coaching sessions. I have always asked, at the end of my classes and my coaching sessions, what the participants are taking away with them. It’s a good way to help them realize what they have gained and for me to see what was meaningful for them. But recently, I’ve been telling both the participants in my courses and my coaching clients what I’m taking away from our time together and it often ends up with an acknowledgement of the progress the client made, or the collaboration the class shared, or how they have touched my heart. It feels good for both the receiver and especially for me, the giver.

How can you increase your purposeful acts of kindness? One thoughtful act a day. Or two? Kindness is definitely contagious.

I’ve caught the kindness feeling. I’m more aware of what I can do for others. It’s my turn to see how thoughtful I can be. They say you are like who you hang out with and I’m hanging out with some really great people. Purposeful act of kindness, here I come!

Follow Your Strengths to Success

December 7, 2009 By Cara Lumen

Passionately On Purpose Radio with Cara Lumen, Your Idea Optimizer, who keeps you passionately on purpose while you make a difference in your world. As a Business Coach, Content Developer and Educator she talks about how to uncover your passion, define your purpose, identify your path, make money from what you already know and attract the people you are meant to serve. But most of all, she’ll help you believe you can!!! Join her Mondays on www.blogtalkradio.com/passionatelyonpurpose

The Show
We are not good at everything, ever. But what we ARE good at we can be very, very good at. What are your strengths? Are you using them to your best advantage? Are you continually developing them? What about that second best strength? How can it be put into play? Let’s talk about how to follow your strengths to success.

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