Self Mastery

Message from a Rainbow Mother

August 23, 2016 By Cara Lumen

I wish I’d known it 60 years ago. I wish I’d known I had the choice. I was born in 1932. There were not many of us because of the depression. Women had only had the right to vote for 22 years. Young men from my generation returned from war when I was in high school. In college the only ambition of every female was to get married and have children. We didn’t know we had a choice. I was nearing 40 when the Women’s Liberation Movement began. And finally, when I’m 83, we may have a female president. As the saying goes: “We’ve come a long way, baby.”

The two aspects to the feminine energy

I was gratified to recently learn that in the Shamanic tradition there are two kinds of feminine energy. First there’s the great “Nurturing Mother” who takes care of everyone. That’s the role model I was certainly brought up with and one that, even with a shift in consciousness, still prevails as the more desirable one.

However, it’s the other expression of the feminine energy that fills my heart, that makes me make peace with myself for my unconventional ways. That other aspect of the feminine energy is the “Rainbow Mother”, the poet, the writer, the dancer, the one who doesn’t fit in. Oh how I wish I’d known that 60 years ago. I am a Rainbow Mother, a full fledged, card-carrying member of the Rainbow Mother band. And I had to break out of the mold to do it.

Do you understand your choices?

Here’s my message to the young women coming along – you have a choice. In this moment in time you still have to work to give yourself permission to be a Rainbow Mother, you have to go against the grain a bit to do it; but you do have a choice. The Rainbow Mother is a valid aspect of your feminine nature.

When I was divorced and found myself in my mid-40s needing to get a job to support myself, nothing I’d ever done as a stay-at-home mom counted in the world of work. Today, wise young women know how to educate themselves and develop a profession even if they do choose to marry and become a parent.

When I was working, women were not executive, they were only working versions of the nurturing mother. There were no rainbow mothers in the corporate world!

Rainbow mothers have great adventures

If I hadn’t honored my “Rainbow” self, I would never be in a position to share what I give today. I would never have known my own capabilities, my own gifts. Because I’m a Rainbow Mother, I know my passion, I still have impact at my advanced age, I have active plans to help change the consciousness around our fragile earth. I have work to do. And I’m loving it.

If you are a Rainbow Mother, go for it

The Incas think in terms of 500-year cycles. We’re just entering a cycle of the feminine. We’re coming from the aggressive, warrior, masculine energy into – well it can go both ways – soft and nurturing and the individualist, the explorer, the leader, the philosopher.

Honor your gifts and follow them. Be the leader, the inspirer. Follow your calling as a Rainbow Mother. The world needs you!

To Sing a Deeper Song consider:
The Length of Your Reach
The Many Faces of Your Calling
How Do You Nurture “Different”
Learn to Honor Your Inner Rhythm
35—How to Hold the Space for Change.
27 – Why Have You Been Chosen

Two Steps Past Hard

August 11, 2016 By Cara Lumen

I recently noticed that it was hard to hold some of the positions in my standing Qi Gong practice and that I’d been allowing myself to shorten the session. What, I wondered, would happen if I took it two steps past hard. Not one step – that’s easy. But two steps, steps that took a little effort, took some determination. Steps that could also lead to improvement or even a breakthrough.

Acknowledge the stuck place

You know the adage “use it or lose it”? The older we get the more important that is. Particularly with our body – and our brain. I’m giving my brain plenty of exercise, but my body, not so much. I need to take my body two steps past hard.

Baby step or giant step?

I’m a determined person. So once I decide that I really do want to push through something, I settle into the harness and move forward. It doesn’t really matter what size step you take as long as it moves you past your stuck place.

When I was learning Scrivener writing software, I had to watch the beginning tutorial five or six times; and each time I mastered a new small step.

Each time I edit a podcast I get better at the process. The same is true with videos, I’m getting more proficient with each one I do. Sometimes moving past the stuck place is simply a matter of persistent practice.

Choose your steps

My stuck place is that in my creative hurry to get to my computer to start writing, I shortchange my standing Qi Gong practice. And yet this is a valuable part of my morning spiritual practice. I simply need to hold each position for a longer period of time. And yes, my muscles are not particularly happy with that!

So I have to take two or even three steps past that hard place – every day.

Acknowledge your victory

And you know what? The minute I hold those positions longer, I’m going to feel very pleased with myself. I’m going to feel confident that I can do even more. I will feel that I’m on the road to reclaiming some of my body strength. And soon I’ll be back to holding the positions even longer than I thought was possible.

All because of taking two steps past the hard place.

Where are you stuck?

Your stuck place may be a subtle internal stuck place or a noticeable physical plane stuck place. You can work on either – or both. I can identify a few too many subtle stuck places when it comes to learning new technical stuff. But once I take it to the other side of stuck, I find wonderful new opportunities open to me.

What is hard for you?

What did you do in the past that you can’t or won’t do any more? If it has to do with your body getting older, find some alternative strength-building ideas and put them into action. If you are stuck emotionally, go deeper within to find your answers – meditate, journal, mind-map, talk to someone – whatever it takes to identify where you’re stuck and to figure out two steps to take you past that point.

“Hard” is created by being unyielding

Hard is about being resistant and rigid. It’s about being inflexible. It can also come from gradually letting things slide.
But hard also means being strong and unbeatable. Drop your resistance to change. Embrace the goal you know you need to achieve. And start working toward it. Two steps at a time. Two steps past hard.

To Sing a Deeper Song Consider:

Learn to Honor Your Inner Rhythm
The Freedom of Not knowing
Lose Your Attachment to the Outcome
The Power of Exploring the Unknown
42 – The Stuck Place Called Decision
35—How to Hold the Space for Change.

Do We Manifest or Simply Choose?

August 9, 2016 By Cara Lumen

Several people around me are in the dumps because they have not manifested what they were visualizing and affirming. I wanted to explore to see if we actually manifest things in our lives or if we simply choose from what the Universe offers.

Embrace the simple act of shaping things as they come

I no longer visualize a future goal or work to manifest things. I simply observe and shape things as they come – allowing each moment to offer a new opportunity for me to consider and choose.

Here’s the quote from Stephen Mitchell’s translation of the Tao Te Ching that started me on the path of letting my life unfold:

The Master allows things to happen
She shapes events as they come
She steps out of the way and  lets the Tao speak for itself.

That quote totally changed how I was living my life. I stopped planning and simply watched while interesting opportunities showed up.

I find it awesome to simply trust, to allow ideas and circumstances to show up. And then be aware enough of who I am and what I want at this moment in time that I can simply take what I want and need in the moment – shape things as they come. I’m letting my life unfold and this is taking me to unexpected places that are exceptionally rewarding.

You are manifesting, whether you want what you get or not!

A friend of mine was very discouraged because she thought that she had lost her ability to manifest what she wanted. She felt helpless and discouraged.

But I’ve been watching her progress and she’s now manifesting awesome things that point to her new path. She just can’t see them in this moment. But I can. She is indeed drawing to her what she needs next.

She quit a high-profile corporate job to start her own business. It was taking longer than she expected. But each week when we spoke I got more excited about the ideas and concepts and interpretation she has to offer. She can change so many lives. It just doesn’t look like she thought it would, so she thinks she’s not succeeding.

That’s the key – you are manifesting things all the time, it just may not be taking you where you thought you were going and in the manner you had imagined.

Understand yourself

You have to look at yourself in a fresh way. Your skills, your passion, the wisdom of this time in your life are all components that factor into your choices. If you ignore your inner growth, that ongoing change within you, you may still be seeking things that you have simply outgrown. Identify your inner desires.

Simply trust

Learn to trust your own intuition and insight. Learn to trust that the organic, ongoing unfolding of your life will bring to you the perfect opportunity. Then trust that you’ll have the wisdom to act from your own inner awareness.

Chose and explore

Back in the days when I used visualization, I understood there were some major reasons that things didn’t show up. It’s possible that what you’re visualizing is not what you need at all. You may be destined for something else.

Another reason some things don’t show up is that the time isn’t right or, something better is on its way to you. If you committed to the thing you want, you wouldn’t be free to take what is intended for you. Be patient with the unfolding process.

What is your calling today?

I didn’t visualize where I am now, I simply adjusted and adapted and listened and made choices. I’m now in my early eighties, and oddly enough, I’m putting out some of the most profound work of my life. I’m feeling rewarded and satisfied, entertained and enlightened. I didn’t plan this – it evolved.

I don’t know where I’m headed. In fact, “future” is not in my thoughts. I stay in the moment of exploring and discovering and sharing what I discover. It’s an exceedingly strong calling. I am not doing the business thing of trying to serve a specific target audience; what I am doing is writing from the heart and sharing it. People are finding me – the right people, at the perfect time in their life – like you and I have connected.

Each moment is filled with undreamed of opportunities. Our choices shape our journey.

Can you let go and simply shape things as they come?

To Sing a Deeper Song consider:

Is Everything You Know Still True
Fitting In Is Not What You Do To Be Extraordinary
How to Develop Your Distinctive Voice
Allow the Right Action to Emerge
27 – Why Have You Been Chosen
28 – How to Walk Beside Someone in Service
Hold the Space for Things To Change
How to Deepen Your Calling

Are You An Independent Learner?

July 21, 2016 By Cara Lumen

If I was a kid today, I’d be hard pressed to keep up with technology. If nothing else, technology is moving so fast that it’s easy to be left behind. How can you help yourself, or your children, learn what they need and what is helpful for them? How do you nurture an independent learner?

We need to learn what we need to know to follow our passion

After we study for a while, we learn that we are better at some things than at others. We may be drawn to math, or writing, or art and get excited about one subject over another. Our mind may work in a way that enables us to learn one thing more easily than another. That’s why it’s a good idea to become an independent learner. You pick and choose what you need to know and figure out the best way to learn it.

We need to learn critical thinking

Critical thinking is when you explore something deeply enough to make an informed decision. The Oxford dictionary defines critical thinking as “The objective analysis and evaluation of an issue in order to form a judgement.” But I know that whatever conclusion we draw will be colored by who we are and what we’re capable of observing.

In critical thinking, you gather as much information as possible, you sift it through your own values and beliefs. You look at the facts. You weigh your options. You examine your needs and come up with a conclusion. Then you act. Or you don’t.

We need to learn what we don’t know

Until you explore the possibilities deeply enough, you cannot see all your choices. You need to at least have a glimpse of what you don’t know and decide what part of it is necessary to learn in order to move forward and what part can be left for another time.

We need a reality check

As an enthusiastic and independent learner, there comes a time when I get to look closely at what I’m doing to see if it’s creating the results I want. My example is self-publishing. I had great plans to get my books onto other platforms and on several services. There was a lot to learn in order to do that. My reality check was that I needed to determine the best use of my time – either by concentrating on writing or on learning the technical stuff to get my work up in a few more places.

My greatest value lies in my creativity. I get to trust that whoever needs to read my work will find it. It helps for me to know how to get my books on Amazon, but is there a better use for my time than figuring out how to get them onto other platforms? Should I start recording the audio version? Should it become a course? How will voice recognition improve my writing? Those are a lot of choices. How am I most impactful in service?

When I make that decision, I can make informed choices.

Learn what you want to learn

If it excites you, learn it. I recently discovered how much I enjoy Nova. I seem to have reached a certain point that it resonates with me. Now, instead of watching dramas that seem either too innocuous or too violent, I can learn about places and people and ideas that are new to me. I find that very exciting.

Whatever you want to learn, you can go on Google and find a course or a video or someone to take you through the basic steps. TED talks give me access to fascinating thinkers who express their passion well. I often join webinars and listen to podcasts that offer me a fresh perspective.

There’s no excuse for not learning what you’re drawn to. It’s very available. It’s up to you to apply yourself.

Explore

I enjoy painting, even though I wouldn’t consider myself a particularly good artist. A few years ago I took an oil-painting class, and although the result was a very bad version of Gauguin, I was excited that I had filled up a blank space with something from my mind.

I took a couple of art courses during my senior year in college. In composition I got a C, but in drawing I got an A+ because I had literally gone from stick figures to doing a decent three-minute sketch. That vast improvement was rewarded.

Explore what interests you – whether you’re any good at it or not. Just nurturing that aspect of yourself opens new possibilities.

Learn by teaching

A How to Write Magnetic Articles course I taught years ago greatly improved my own writing skills because I had to research and learn more and organize my thoughts in order to teach it to others.

As I’m on a personal quest to discover the meaning of concepts that intrigue me, writing about them to explain them to myself is how I’m eventually going to share them with others.

Keep learning. Share what you know. It will grow you.

Independent Learning is what you do for yourself

You don’t learn something to pass a test, or even to complete a task, you learn because something calls to you, you are compelled to explore whatever it is that fascinates you.

Are you an independent learner? What’s next on your agenda? How do you nurture your need to learn?

To Sing a Deeper Song consider:

How Do You Nurture “Different”
The Power of Your Personal Path
What to Do When You Are Between Teachers
The Art of Mastery
Fitting In Is Not What You Do To Be Extraordinary
27 – Why Have You Been Chose

Lose Your Attachment to the Outcome

May 2, 2016 By Cara Lumen

When you truly don’t care how something turns out, there’s no stress, no pressure, no worry. How freeing! I’m not suggesting we don’t care about our life, but I am suggesting we learn to be more amenable to whatever shape it takes. We can learn to go with the flow, shape things as they come and accept what develops. Surely we can.

Release your attachment to the timing of things

Timing is one of the trickiest things to let go. Years ago, when I first became a Reiki Master Teacher, I wanted to create some classes, both first and second degree. It was as easy as opening my calendar and writing them in. I decided to have three first-degree classes before I offered one second-degree class since I knew not everyone would move on. That’s it. A logical decision based on expectation and a calendar to set the dates. I made up the timing. I could change the timing.

What timing have you made up that you are attached to? If you let go of that idea, how would you feel? What new space would open up. What new opportunity would appear?

Take a reality check and clear out the impossible

Right now, every week I send out two posts, one podcast and a newsletter. If I want to add videos or work on my books, I may have to alter that delivery promise.

It has taken me a long time to self-publish my two latest ebooks because I had to learn Scrivener and the process for Amazon and Smashwords. If I had made a due date, a delivery date, I would have been stressed beyond all measure.

As it was, I just kept taking small steps, studying a new tutorial every day, and honoring what I felt ready to learn/do next. Clear the space for the next step you need to take.

Release your attachment to the form of things

When I became overwhelmed and stressed out in the self-publishing process, a friend suggested I just focus on creating one form. The relief was immediate. All I had to do was create the pdf for my site. That alone would give me a great sense of accomplishment. Then I could focus on placing them on Amazon. Trying to produce both forms together felt overwhelming. Taking one at a time was very doable. What basic form must your create first? Just do that.

Release your attachment to the need for things

Possessions are a personal choice. A lot. A little. If you decide you want more of something, take time to look at what it will take to get it. Does it mean longer hours, less family time, more stress? Measure what you give up in order to get more things.

The less I have around me, the more I have inside me. The more simply I live my life, the greater the impact. I no longer add material possessions to my home. Instead, I cherish what I have and even look to see which of those I can pass forward.

Possessions can take some sacrifice. Put your needs and wants in balance with the reality check of what it will take to acquire and maintain them.

Release your attachment to the use of things

I used to be an impulse buyer. I got excited about a lot of things. I have better control over that today but I still got a bit carried away when I purchased a juicer based on the enthusiasm of someone who gave a class. I know I am easily influenced by the excitement of others and I have to watch that when it comes to adding things to my life.

It works best when I wait before I buy. Often when I wait I find that I truly do not need or want what I was attached to. Time is a great leveler of what you want versus what you need.

Release your attachment tot the outcome

Attachment to the outcome is a huge creator of stress. There are so many perfect ways a situation can unfold. Wouldn’t it be easier to simply go along with the flow and see what shows up?

When you are attached to the outcome you make plans. You outline, you set deadlines, you move in a specific direction.

When you go with the flow you have a broad objective in mind and with every opportunity that appears, you measure and weigh, consider how you feel and if/how it fits into your objective, or if your objective should be changed because of this new information.

You make your choice based on where you are in the moment, not on where you were weeks ago. You have new information, new insights, new awareness. Choose from the present moment.

In order to be in the moment, become more aware

Respond, don’t react. When I get a new idea, I often stop what I’m doing and write a post about it in order to figure it out. The idea for this post came from an article I noticed about relieving stress. As I looked to see how I managed stress I realized that I’m not stressed because I’m not attached to any outcome.

Yet good things happen in their own good time. For instance, my books will get where they’re supposed to go; I just don’t know exactly when that will be.

I let the ideas change form. Although I explore the idea of attachment to outcome in this article, I already see it expanded into a podcast. Maybe it will even become a course. I don’t know yet. The Universe will surprise me.

And whatever I decide to do, whenever I decide to do it, will be perfect. I just get to trust it to unfold and make myself available when and where I’m needed.

Can you begin to lose your attachment to outcome? How relaxed and free will that make you feel?

To Sing a Deeper Song consider:
Hold the Space for Things To Change
Are You in the Right Room?
Engage in the Power of trust
Fitting In Is Not What You Do To Be Extraordinary
How to Develop Your Distinctive Voice
Unleash the Power of The 20 Minute Lesson
32 – How to See Your Work As Art
31-How to Cultivate The Power of Simplicity
30 – The No Plan Plan