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Why You Should Start Hanging Out with People Who are Playing Bigger than You Are

July 8, 2008 By Cara Lumen

by Cara Lumen

 

I’m about to be stretched. I’m about to be asked to think bigger than I have been, to look at possibilities that I’ve never considered and to probably change my thinking. I’m going to start hanging out with people who are playing bigger than I am.

 

You can only take yourself so far

 

We need to surround ourselves with people who see our potential. From within our own lives our viewpoint of what is possible for us is limited by old beliefs and fears. But other people don’t see that, they don’t know what thoughts stop us, they only see our potential. We need to hang out with them so we can have a bigger view of what is possible for us.

 

I used to keep an acknowledgement book in which I wrote the nice things people said about me with the date it was said. When I started feeling dumpy about myself I’d read what was written. "Oh, they saw that in me? I didn’t know." Now I simply save the lovely emails and the amazing testimonials that people give me. But I still have to go read them periodically to reaffirm my own value.

 

Hanging out with the bigger players shows you how it’s done

 

Every time I have a conversation with someone about their services or the way they manage their business, I find some small nugget for myself that I can adapt or modify or just plain use.

 

I’m about to acquire another coaching certification and as I give thought to how I will work it into my current business I find my vision expanding. When I talked to another participant about how he structured his coaching practice I began to rethink mine. When I heard how much he charged I realized I was ready to reposition my fees and attract more clients who firmly believe that my coaching is well worth the money and are willing to spend it to grow their business.

 

And it’s scary

 

I’m in a funny place. At 75 when someone asks me what my five year plan is my answer is "To still be here!" But that’s a joke, because I’m building my business with all the intention of working it for another 30 years. But there is an energy about someone twenty or thirty years younger that I need to recapture.

 

That’s another reason to hang out with people who are playing bigger than I am. I need to create my version of my business in a way that honors who I am, what I know how to do, and how I want to live my life. And I need to watch what other people are doing for ideas.

 

So I have to overcome the fact that only 10% of women my age went to college (I went back for my MA at 40) and that women of my generation were only expected to grow up and be housewives.

 

I have to overcome the loss of confidence I discovered when I reentered the work force after fifteen years of raising children to find what I knew how to do had no value to others in the work place.

 

And I get to celebrate my blossoming as my creative, enthusiastic self and the fact that at long last I am deeply involved in what I love to do.

 

Now that I’ve made it to this point I get to do more.

 

So I’m going to go hang out with people who are doing their business well and see what I can learn from them. And while I’m at it I’ll keep an eye out on what I can teach them.

 

You see it’s not about who is better or worse, who is more than or less than, it’s a study in how beautifully different each of us are. I will engage in this training environment with a willingness to learn, an enthusiasm to share, and an expectation of both inner and outer expansion.

 

That’s why it’s important to periodically go hang out with people playing bigger than you are.

 

© 2008 Cara Lumen

 

Filed Under: Content Development Tagged With: business growth, inspiration, mentor, Self Mastery, values

Cara Lumen, transformational thinker, shamanist, and founder of the Deeper Song Community helps you uncover the treasures of the inner self.

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Do not follow where the path may lead, go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

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